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Post of The Month (August)

Meggles is our Post of The Month winner voted by the community for the following post:

"my recent post and a comment from another user has made me realise that self care is so important.

I wanted to start a thread in the Health and Wellbeing section of the boards about self care.

Self care is provided by you, for you

I know a lot of us are struggling at the moment with different aspects of our own lives, and sometimes we get so lost in these we forget to take time for ourselves. This tread is, a Reminder to you to take time out for yourself during the difficult times.

down in the comments I would really love for people to share ideas and tips about self- care. to remind ourselves and others in the community.

My way of self care when i recognise ( or someone recognises i have neglected myself) is:

Take a walk and admire whats around me ( take as long as needed)
treat myself to a bath with a bathbomb and bubbles ( bubbles are important)
make a hot drink and just sit down with a film.

Please feel free to share your ideas!

The Mix have a guide to self-care which you can find here."
(Click for full post )
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  • Chat Guidelines

    The Mix chat room is a safe and welcoming place to meet others, have a chat, and get support if you need it. Keeping it safe and welcoming is down to you. We allow a lot of freedom in chat but we do ask that you respect the group and communicate in a way that isn't upsetting to others.


    GROUP AGREEMENT

    Chat is a friendly place - I will be welcoming, respectful and ready to listen. Over time I might make friends with other chatters but if we're talking away from chat I agree to keep that separate and focus on the session I'm in.

    Chat is a group environment - I'm prepared for a bit of give and take and I'll help to include everyone. I'll also make sure I consider what I say and how it may impact others.

    Chat is a diverse place - We've all had different experiences and sometimes we might disagree on something, but that's OK. If I feel upset by something I'll self-moderate (take a break to calm down or use the ignore function).

    Chatters often choose to be anonymous - I won't repeat anything I hear in chat elsewhere and I won't share personal contact details in the chat room.

    Chatters who aren't able to co-operate risk being kicked out of chat sessions.



    Read the FULL GUIDELINES HERE.


    How can I give feedback about chat?
    If you want to give your feedback about a chat session you've attended then please get in touch by using the Feedback form

    Positive feedback and constructive criticism welcome.

    Happy chatting
    We're Aife & Mike: the staff team here at The Mix.
    If you have any questions about this place, feel free to
    ask over in the
    Help Desk or send us a private message.

  • #2
    Just a bit of a moral dilemma I keep coming across in chat, and I think everyone else does too and it causes a bit of conflict sometimes.

    What if a topic or word is mentioned (that is not explicitly against the guidelines) that could be sensitive, and anyone is triggered?

    Is freedom of speech impeded and the topic/word etc. is banned, or does chat continue in spite of anyone triggered?

    There's a fine line between impeding free speech and keeping an environment safe for sensitive people, so I'm confused lol
    "There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so"- Hamlet

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by Aidan View Post
      Just a bit of a moral dilemma I keep coming across in chat, and I think everyone else does too and it causes a bit of conflict sometimes.

      What if a topic or word is mentioned (that is not explicitly against the guidelines) that could be sensitive, and anyone is triggered?

      Is freedom of speech impeded and the topic/word etc. is banned, or does chat continue in spite of anyone triggered?

      There's a fine line between impeding free speech and keeping an environment safe for sensitive people, so I'm confused lol
      amen to this.
      Last edited by Meggles; 17-08-2017, 10:10 PM.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Aidan View Post
        What if a topic or word is mentioned (that is not explicitly against the guidelines) that could be sensitive, and anyone is triggered?
        This is exactly what I mean. I had this problem the other week where I was flagged for using the term "binge" and before I could start talking about how I was feeling I had already descended into trying to argue my point, it wasn't specific in any way, shape or form. With some subjects it's inevitable that people will get triggered but it's your responsibility as an individual to remove yourself from that situation. Same as you would do if it were too hot, you'd go somewhere cooler.

        I get that you're trying to keep the environment as trigger free as possible but there is nothing wrong with using relevant terminology that is vague (enough as it is). We should have a bit more freedom considering it's a site aimed at young adults.
        Last edited by Salix alba; 18-08-2017, 03:22 AM. Reason: Condensed it.

        Comment


        • #5
          I think it's a two pronged problem:

          -The guidelines are a bit vague so people tip toe around subjects hoping to not trigger others (the guidelines were recently changed to be more explicit about eating, this is a step in the right direction )

          - It's the mods' jobs to give users a friendly reminder about guidelines if they are broken, it isn't down to other users. This often creates conflict and depending on how it is worded it can be hurtful to the other users.

          Some people are very good when it comes to knowing what to say and not say, but not everyone's a mind-reader :\
          "There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so"- Hamlet

          Comment


          • #6
            As much as it is a responsibility to remove ourselves from the situation by using the mute button or taking a break from chat. Barely anyone does actually do it. If people actually took on board the whole mute or take a break. I'm pretty damn sure there will less people being banned for silly reasons.

            I don't see how just using a word is triggering and can cause conflict. I'd understand more of it was brought up with so much detail like binging and purging has on occasion, but I don't get how a simple world can cause so much conflict.
            In all honesty mods need to just freeze people as soon as conflict starts instead of riding it out and inturpting the whole chat.. it makes it less of a safe and supportive environment.
            They need to actually be more firm with the guidelines in chat

            Comment


            • #7
              I 100% agree with what has been said above. The chat is becoming more and more restricted in terms of language we can use. If a user becomes upset or triggered by a certain word then it is up to them to take a step back to look after their own wellbeing which at the moment doesn't usually happen, it normally leads down the other path which is conflict which majority of the time is prolonged by the mods saying, mute the user but how is dodging the confrontation going to fix things, we can't just go pretending that it never happen - we need to face the problem head on.

              Also it is the moderators job in chat to in force the chat guidelines instead of users. Some users feel like they have to take over that job sometimes due to the moderators doing absolutely nothing. Us users seem to know so much more than them.
              'Mental health is not a not a destination but a process. It's about how you drive and not where you're going'

              Comment


              • #8
                i feel like as a community we should be able to come together like this and have more of an input and work along side the mods to improve the services provided.
                such as a workshop to go through the guidance and allow us to have a say so situations like this dont occur etc.
                because until this point. i feel like we as users just get slienced.. but its us using the services and we should have a voice

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Meggles View Post
                  i feel like as a community we should be able to come together like this and have more of an input and work along side the mods to improve the services provided.
                  such as a workshop to go through the guidance and allow us to have a say so situations like this dont occur etc.
                  because until this point. i feel like we as users just get slienced.. but its us using the services and we should have a voice
                  Well said

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Meggles View Post
                    i feel like as a community we should be able to come together like this and have more of an input and work along side the mods to improve the services provided.
                    I think a collaboration with the mods to make the mix better is a great idea!
                    "There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so"- Hamlet

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Meggles View Post
                      i feel like as a community we should be able to come together like this and have more of an input and work along side the mods to improve the services provided.
                      such as a workshop to go through the guidance and allow us to have a say so situations like this dont occur etc.
                      because until this point. i feel like we as users just get slienced.. but its us using the services and we should have a voice
                      100% agree
                      'Mental health is not a not a destination but a process. It's about how you drive and not where you're going'

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Aidan View Post

                        I think a collaboration with the mods to make the mix better is a great idea!

                        workshop chats, threads for us to express ideas.
                        by coming together as a community we can work through these issues, conflicts and work alongside the mods to make chat and the boards a more community feeling place

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          The Mix better not put us up for the firing squad for this lmao. we just want to express how we feel and be heard and make positive changes in the community so please listen to us

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Firing squad
                            You guys at the mix, what you think? And I don't mean about firing squads
                            "There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so"- Hamlet

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Meggles View Post


                              workshop chats, threads for us to express ideas.
                              by coming together as a community we can work through these issues, conflicts and work alongside the mods to make chat and the boards a more community feeling place

                              Sounds good

                              Comment

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