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Expert chat: Enthusiastic Consent & Conditional Consent (Wed 21st February)

Hey everyone!

On Wednesday 21st Feb at 6.30pm, Sarah our expert, will be running an expert chat about Enthusiastic Consent and Conditional Consent.

Sarah is the co-founder of Scarlet Ladies, a community of women with the aim to destigmatise and normalise the conversation around female sexuality.

Suffering from post traumatic stress disorder after experiencing a number of traumas, including rape, Sarah is reclaiming her body by engaging in bodybuilding and powerlifting. Taking back control of her sexuality, she is currently remaining abstinent. Working and campaigning with other women for the sexual empowerment of women has been an integral part of her healing journey.


Come along and join us! Find out more here
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Vanilla features: have your say

As we move to our new boards software, Vanilla, we'll have a few new features at our disposal. We're keen to hear what you all think about them, so head here to have your say over how we'll use (or not use) some of the new features. Fill out the form before Wednesday the 21st to tell us your thoughts and have the option of joining our testing team!
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The Great Boards Migration

Great news! We're moving to new discussion boards software. Head here for the full announcement.
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Post of The Month

One-in-a-million is our Post of The Month winner voted by the community for the following post:

"Just a bit of fun here if you could create an advent calendar what would you put in it and why.

For me you would still get chocolate 😆😆
But inside each door is a task for the day. Something that includes you helping/talking to others, doing something festive and spreading Christmas cheer
For example

1. Tell your parents/carers you love them
2. Say hello when passing an OAP (that might be the only thing someone says to them all week)
3. Watch a Christmas movie
4. Help someone in need e.g put some spare change in a charity box, buy a warm drink for the homeless person who sits on the corner, dothe washing up ha ha ha😂
5 make hot chocolate
6. Visit your grandparents (if you donít already) They will more than likely love to see you.
7. Sing a Christmas song with a friend
8. Dress up in something Christmasy when you do your shopping.

You get the idea 😂😉 my reason for this is to get people in the mood and understand what Christmas actually means.

What would yours have and why."
(Click for full post )
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    Just a small one,
    On my thumb,
    No one would notice,
    Cos there quite dumb

    Just a medium one,
    On my palm,
    No one would notice,
    They donít look that hard,

    Just finished it off,
    Make it a large,
    As it creeps up my arm,
    and goes right through my heart.

    (self harming in stages of getting worse, needed to type something fast, it's getting really hard again today, I wonder if it ever ends)

  • #2
    I wonder if it ever ends too. Thank you for sharing this one, it really speaks to me. I was thinking how to reply to it, so I wrote my own poem about my fight with my head.
    Tough times never last, but tough people do

    Comment


    • #3
      A conversation with myself
      By me

      Slumped in this bed,
      Fighting the thoughts in this head.
      Close the curtains, dwell in the dark,
      You’ve already left your mark.

      “Oh, but why couldn’t you see?
      You could’t live without me!
      And every thing that makes you smile,
      Will set you back another mile.”

      No, none of it’s true;
      I’d be better off without you!
      I’ll take these tablets, make you go,
      You can’t bring me down so low.

      “You threaten me with pills
      When this is a battle of wills?
      Take your tablets, see if I care.
      They’ll do nothing against your nightmare!”

      Maybe, just maybe, these tablets won’t do,
      But either way, I’m through with you!
      All I want is to be happy, that’s all.
      I’ll throw away these chains and stand up tall.

      “You think you’re imprisoned in your own bed?
      It is I who’s imprisoned inside of your head!
      End your life, and you and I will be free.
      All of your problems will die with me.”

      I won’t die, you can’t kill me!
      But there’s nowhere to run, nowhere to flee…
      No! I won’t! I’ll live instead!
      You’ll be gone long before I’m dead!

      “I thought we understood each other,
      I thought of you like a brother.
      But I already killed you years ago,
      Left you lifeless in the snow.
      There’s no battle to fight, no war to win.
      I buried your soul, it’s my greatest sin.
      I’ve controlled this body all along,
      You think still there’s hope for you? You’re wrong.”

      Tough times never last, but tough people do

      Comment


      • #4
        That's just amazing, I love it, it's really what it's like, u say am a good writer but ur fantastic, really would love to see more of ur stuff if u fancy putting any more up need to see it!!!

        I decided to go back to judo tonight, I've already tried to go back twice and each time I got closer to going into the class so hopefully third times a charm and it helps with the urges, have u got any plans tonight? (maybe writing more poetry )

        Comment


        • #5
          Thanks I'm literally blushing right now
          I'm might be good at it when I try, but that's the point, I can't be bothered most of the time haha

          Judo? I was thinking of maybe getting into a martial art, but something more practical like Krav Maga. Not classes like, I'd rather sit alone and read about it and do it by myself. Because I'm not a people person

          I got any plans tonight? Not really, and I think that's enough poetry for today
          Tough times never last, but tough people do

          Comment


          • #6
            Well you certainly have a talent for it,

            I would so love to do Krav Maga, never seen it before but just looked it up there and it seems amazing, might have a look for some classes, I finally got back to judo third time lucky and I actually went through the doors (still feeling like I was having a heart attack tho). I know it is terrifying to do new things and people are just ewww to be around but you should try a class once or twice, it might not be as bad as you think.

            Comment


            • #7
              Good for you getting back to Judo! I hate being in a room full of people too. I've just been to the post office, I nearly had a panic attack, I stuttered like hell at the counter and my voice broke. So that's nice. All for an envelope and some jelly beans.

              Krav Maga seems to be all about practical self defense and disarming people, which would actually be useful where I live where everyone seems to own a cartel 😂

              The closest classes to me are in Sheffield, which is miles away, and that means overcoming another fear- buses

              I'll either try it alone or not bother, or you could get classes and pass on your skills *wink* *wink*

              : )
              Tough times never last, but tough people do

              Comment


              • #8
                Love both of these!
                I dont want a signature.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Lostsense View Post
                  Love both of these!
                  Thanks

                  To rhyme
                  Aint no crime
                  Its fine
                  When I have the time
                  To write line after line
                  Of the shit in my mind

                  Just a quick one off top of my head right now haha
                  Last edited by Aidan; 01-05-2017, 09:40 PM. Reason: Added smileys :)smiles go for miles while a frown will take you down
                  Tough times never last, but tough people do

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    lol, laughed so much at this, it's perfect

                    Comment

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