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Expert chat: Enthusiastic Consent & Conditional Consent (Wed 21st February)

Hey everyone!

On Wednesday 21st Feb at 6.30pm, Sarah our expert, will be running an expert chat about Enthusiastic Consent and Conditional Consent.

Sarah is the co-founder of Scarlet Ladies, a community of women with the aim to destigmatise and normalise the conversation around female sexuality.

Suffering from post traumatic stress disorder after experiencing a number of traumas, including rape, Sarah is reclaiming her body by engaging in bodybuilding and powerlifting. Taking back control of her sexuality, she is currently remaining abstinent. Working and campaigning with other women for the sexual empowerment of women has been an integral part of her healing journey.


Come along and join us! Find out more here
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Vanilla features: have your say

As we move to our new boards software, Vanilla, we'll have a few new features at our disposal. We're keen to hear what you all think about them, so head here to have your say over how we'll use (or not use) some of the new features. Fill out the form before Wednesday the 21st to tell us your thoughts and have the option of joining our testing team!
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The Great Boards Migration

Great news! We're moving to new discussion boards software. Head here for the full announcement.
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Post of The Month

One-in-a-million is our Post of The Month winner voted by the community for the following post:

"Just a bit of fun here if you could create an advent calendar what would you put in it and why.

For me you would still get chocolate 😆😆
But inside each door is a task for the day. Something that includes you helping/talking to others, doing something festive and spreading Christmas cheer
For example

1. Tell your parents/carers you love them
2. Say hello when passing an OAP (that might be the only thing someone says to them all week)
3. Watch a Christmas movie
4. Help someone in need e.g put some spare change in a charity box, buy a warm drink for the homeless person who sits on the corner, dothe washing up ha ha ha😂
5 make hot chocolate
6. Visit your grandparents (if you donít already) They will more than likely love to see you.
7. Sing a Christmas song with a friend
8. Dress up in something Christmasy when you do your shopping.

You get the idea 😂😉 my reason for this is to get people in the mood and understand what Christmas actually means.

What would yours have and why."
(Click for full post )
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How you can look after yourself

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  • How you can look after yourself

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    In honour of World Mental Health day I've collected just a few of many top tips you can use when you're having a particularly bad day and you guys can help come up with some more

    1. Be active
    -
    Regular physical activity is associated with lower rates of depression and anxiety across all age groups.

    Exercise is essential for slowing age-related cognitive decline and for promoting well-being.
    But it doesn’t need to be particularly intense for you to feel good - slower-paced activities, such as walking, can have the benefit of encouraging social interactions as well providing some level of exercise.
    Today, why not get physical? Here are a few ideas:
    • Take the stairs not the lift
    • Go for a walk at lunchtime
    • Walk into work or college - perhaps with a colleague or classmate – so you can ‘connect’ as well
    • Get off the bus one stop earlier than usual and walk the final part of your journey to work or education
    • Organise a work sporting activity
    • Have a kick-about in a local park
    • Do some ‘easy exercise’, like stretching, before you leave for work in the morning
    • Walk to someone’s desk instead of calling or emailing
    2. Take notice
    -
    Reminding yourself to ‘take notice’ can strengthen and broaden awareness.
    Studies have shown that being aware of what is taking place in the present directly enhances your well-being and savouring ‘the moment’ can help to reaffirm your life priorities.
    Heightened awareness also enhances your self-understanding and allows you to make positive choices based on your own values and motivations.
    Take some time to enjoy the moment and the environment around you. Here are a few ideas:
    • Get a plant for your workspace
    • Have a ‘clear the clutter’ day
    • Take notice of how your colleagues are feeling or acting
    • Take a different route on your journey to or from work
    • Visit a new place for lunch.
    3. Daydream/Meditate
    - Take a mental vacation. Let your mind wander for a while.
    Try meditating or daydreaming. put some music on and imagine yourself where you really want to be. (i.e on a beach, with the wind softly blowing and a cocktail in hand) just think of where you really want to be right now or where you feel most at home.


    So what are your guys thoughts on this? what are some of your top tips?
    Attached Files
    "Weave me a rope that will pull me through these impossible times"
    ~ Tim Finn



    - LAINE

  • #2
    Absolutely love this list you've put together, Lane. I particularly like the ideas around varying your routine slightly - taking a slightly different route to work, walking part of your journey where you'd usually get a bus, etc. It's amazing how much freshness those little changes can bring you, and how nice it can feel to be broken out of an automatic routine.

    I would also add that, occasionally, I find it really nice to just do nothing. Like, literally nothing. Have a lie down on my bed without music, without a TV on, and without texting. It's a bit of a weird feeling sometimes because we're so used to constantly doing stuff and our senses being so busy, but allowing yourself to 'let go' of all of that can be very therapeutic.

    Reading that back, I realise I basically just described meditation, but whatever.

    I'm not sure if this is strictly good for your mental health, but in terms of just getting out of your own head for a little while I do enjoy sinking pretty deeply into a good video game. Taking the time to get set up with headphones etc. and just get lost in it for a while. It can be a nice escape, if nothing else. I guess not unlike diving into a good book.
    Taking care of yourself takes care of more than just yourself.

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