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Chatwee Update

Update - There's been some technical difficulties launching Chatwee onto our website so we will not be moving to Chatwee on Thursday.

As soon as we fix this issue, we'll announce another date for launching. We're really sorry for the delay in Chatwee, thanks so much for your patience.
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Post of The Month (September)

Maisy is our Post of The Month winner voted by the community for the following post:

"Hey Shaunie,

​I care. I really relate to what you have been experiencing with the house falling apart, and things not getting fixed due to general shame of the state of the house and not knowing where to begin fixing things or who to contact (you don't want to come across rogue tradesmen). Not even having adequate heating and hot water. And clutter. Everywhere. It's horrible to live in such circumstances, I know. It's hard as well when you see everyone else living a 'normal' life and yet being unable to talk about your situation."
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How do you keep going

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  • How do you keep going

    How do you keep going when the worst thing has happened ....

    I wake up every morning and wish and wonder why I'm not dead ,i can sleep for ages but still wake up exhausted , i carnt be open with anyone because i feel like they don't care and when they say they do they really don't that's why i keep it to myself. I've started drinking soo much recently and it should bother me but it doesn't it just helps numb the pain. I see everyone one moving on with there life's and I'm stuck here standing still and it hurts what do i need to do to make it stop.


    I feel so alone. unwanted used . Messed up , unworthy , dead inside , crushed , drowning , hurt ,lost and beyond help . I close my eyes and i can see him raping me over and over again how is that fair i can feel him , hear him , smell him its touture and I'm done with it , i wish i kept quiet about it because it would be easier to let it carry on than deal with this now

    If i could leave this world with no questions asked i would but i guess I'll just keep it to myself from now on 😭😭😭😭
    Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
    Dr. Seuss

  • #2
    .
    Last edited by Gracey_; 13-03-2017, 07:32 PM. Reason: No one cares any way
    Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
    Dr. Seuss

    Comment


    • #3
      Hey Horsemad

      I care I really do 💜💙

      Unfortunately though I don't know how you keep going on when the worst has happened.

      Lovely I too see him the person who raped me when I close my eyes and often go round in my head that I wish he would of killed me instead.

      I really don't know what to say because I feel all them words too but I just wanted to drop by and send some gentle hugs and say that I do care about you.
      'Why are you trying to fit in be born to stand out'

      Comment


      • #4
        Hi horsemad.
        I also dont have the answer to your question. But I get and hear every word your saying. So your not alone.
        And there's a reason your here otherwise you wouldn't be here. You just have to wait til everything gets a bit easier. Which I agree - none of how you feel is fair. And it's sucks and upsetting that you feel that low. But you're still here which shows you're a very strong person.
        Even if you can't see a reason to live. Find one. Even as little as eating your faviourate food. Or live for someone ekse and carrying on living for them because they would be devastated without you. And then when things get easier you'll be living because you want to. Not saying life will be completely easy later but they wont be completely shit.
        And you're not beyond help. And there is help out there. Not the best but it helps a lot of people.
        I dont expect anything - to just end up disappointed. But i do not have zero hope for the future cause that has only dragged me down & brung negativity. I will just not predict the future

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Lostsense View Post
          Hey Horsemad

          I care I really do 💜💙

          Unfortunately though I don't know how you keep going on when the worst has happened.

          Lovely I too see him the person who raped me when I close my eyes and often go round in my head that I wish he would of killed me instead.

          I really don't know what to say because I feel all them words too but I just wanted to drop by and send some gentle hugs and say that I do care about you.
          Hey lost sense

          Thanks for replying , thank you I'm finding it hard to feel like people care when I know they do..

          Flash backs are awful and there never ending the abuse hasn't stopped it's still on going i just want o give up xx
          Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
          Dr. Seuss

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Shaunie View Post
            Hi horsemad.
            I also dont have the answer to your question. But I get and hear every word your saying. So your not alone.
            And there's a reason your here otherwise you wouldn't be here. You just have to wait til everything gets a bit easier. Which I agree - none of how you feel is fair. And it's sucks and upsetting that you feel that low. But you're still here which shows you're a very strong person.
            Even if you can't see a reason to live. Find one. Even as little as eating your faviourate food. Or live for someone ekse and carrying on living for them because they would be devastated without you. And then when things get easier you'll be living because you want to. Not saying life will be completely easy later but they wont be completely shit.
            And you're not beyond help. And there is help out there. Not the best but it helps a lot of people.
            Hey shaunie

            Everything is just getting to me
            Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
            Dr. Seuss

            Comment


            • #7
              Don't give up horsemad!

              I've not long been put on paroxetine for flashbacks. Are you any meds to help with the flashbacks?

              Why haven't you reported it to the police? It's probably an easy thing for me to say because I reported it the same night not a doubt in my mind was not to because I didn't want him to do it to anyone else.

              Stay strong xxx
              'Why are you trying to fit in be born to stand out'

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by Lostsense View Post
                Don't give up horsemad!

                I've not long been put on paroxetine for flashbacks. Are you any meds to help with the flashbacks?

                Why haven't you reported it to the police? It's probably an easy thing for me to say because I reported it the same night not a doubt in my mind was not to because I didn't want him to do it to anyone else.

                Stay strong xxx
                It's soo hard not to give up

                I've not told anyone one about them I'm scared they won't understand ..

                I have a ISVA who can help me go through the reporting process but it's his word against mine
                Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
                Dr. Seuss

                Comment


                • #9
                  I know it is.

                  Yeah I had an ISVA.

                  His word is wrong though and they will see that.
                  'Why are you trying to fit in be born to stand out'

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    I'm soo scared to meet my isva she's going to come to my house next Wednesday but i just want to cancel it xx
                    Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
                    Dr. Seuss

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      NOOOOO don't cancel it! My ISVA was lovely xx
                      'Why are you trying to fit in be born to stand out'

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Lostsense View Post
                        NOOOOO don't cancel it! My ISVA was lovely xx
                        I'm soo scared
                        Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
                        Dr. Seuss

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          It's okay to feel scared. I was scared too xx
                          'Why are you trying to fit in be born to stand out'

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Lostsense View Post
                            It's okay to feel scared. I was scared too xx
                            I just wish i wasn't always so scared
                            Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
                            Dr. Seuss

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Have you talked to RAINN before?xx
                              'Why are you trying to fit in be born to stand out'

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