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Expert chat: Enthusiastic Consent & Conditional Consent (Wed 21st February)

Hey everyone!

On Wednesday 21st Feb at 6.30pm, Sarah our expert, will be running an expert chat about Enthusiastic Consent and Conditional Consent.

Sarah is the co-founder of Scarlet Ladies, a community of women with the aim to destigmatise and normalise the conversation around female sexuality.

Suffering from post traumatic stress disorder after experiencing a number of traumas, including rape, Sarah is reclaiming her body by engaging in bodybuilding and powerlifting. Taking back control of her sexuality, she is currently remaining abstinent. Working and campaigning with other women for the sexual empowerment of women has been an integral part of her healing journey.


Come along and join us! Find out more here
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Vanilla features: have your say

As we move to our new boards software, Vanilla, we'll have a few new features at our disposal. We're keen to hear what you all think about them, so head here to have your say over how we'll use (or not use) some of the new features. Fill out the form before Wednesday the 21st to tell us your thoughts and have the option of joining our testing team!
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The Great Boards Migration

Great news! We're moving to new discussion boards software. Head here for the full announcement.
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Post of The Month

One-in-a-million is our Post of The Month winner voted by the community for the following post:

"Just a bit of fun here if you could create an advent calendar what would you put in it and why.

For me you would still get chocolate 😆😆
But inside each door is a task for the day. Something that includes you helping/talking to others, doing something festive and spreading Christmas cheer
For example

1. Tell your parents/carers you love them
2. Say hello when passing an OAP (that might be the only thing someone says to them all week)
3. Watch a Christmas movie
4. Help someone in need e.g put some spare change in a charity box, buy a warm drink for the homeless person who sits on the corner, dothe washing up ha ha ha😂
5 make hot chocolate
6. Visit your grandparents (if you donít already) They will more than likely love to see you.
7. Sing a Christmas song with a friend
8. Dress up in something Christmasy when you do your shopping.

You get the idea 😂😉 my reason for this is to get people in the mood and understand what Christmas actually means.

What would yours have and why."
(Click for full post )
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The daith Piercing

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  • The daith Piercing

    SO guys I thought I'd post about my experience with the daith piercing.
    I've uploaded some pictures sorry about the lighting in the first one lol they are both me just in very different lights :P

    I had my daith done in December after hearing how many people were saying it had helped their migraines. Now I'm terrible with pain and so many people had said it was extremely painful and had been their worst piercing.
    I took my friend as I was extremely nervous. I wouldn't say it was painless but by the time I had felt anything it was done I would say it's like a small pinch with a little bit of pressure. He then put the jewellery (the ring with ball) in which to be honest I didn't feel anything just a bit of pressure and as if he was pulling a bit. Again not exactly painful in my opinion. I took the picture about half an hour after it was done and by then it was throbbing and a bit sore but nothing that wasn't bearable.
    I was told to clean it twice a day with warm salt water until it was fully healed (normally 3-6 months but can take Up to 12 months)
    I will say make sure you stick to the cleaning! I got a bit lazy at one point and stopped but regretted it as it started getting sore. But cleaning does help make sure it doesn't get infected I was quite lucky mine didn't lol.
    So I went back last week just to check in and see if they felt like it was healing right. I was now 4 months into the healing stage, however the guy told me it looked as if it was healed to him. He asked if it was still sore which I told him it wasn't. However I didn't think to tell him it had been a little sore the week before.
    So I picked out a ring (the heart) and took it upstairs to be changed. There was a girl waiting before me also getting her daith piercing changed which she had 9 months ago. She was straight in and straight out with no problems.
    There was a girl working that day she double checked and said she thought it looked fine. However then it came to changing it. I will admit this was very very painful!!! bear in mind you cannot see inside the daith piercing so it looked ok from the outside but wasn't quite ready on the inside but by now the ring was out so I had to have the other one in now. Again that was very painful! I would say I was in there a good 5 mins getting it changed. She told me she was sorry but it did look healed from the outside. This is when I said it was sore the week before. She explained that I should of mentioned this and that this was the reason for it being so painful to change.
    In other words ensure you know its healed before getting it changed or it will make it hard work lol XD
    I would also recommend going for a smaller ring then I did (the heart) at least for your first change. As mine wasn't quite ready I still need to carry on cleaning it twice a day, I cleaned it last night and it moved and the jewels got stuck in the top courner where the piercing is and with me not being used to it and my piercing still not being quite healed it hurt a bit trying get it un stick as it dug into my piercing and made it sore.
    I wouldn't say it's stopped my migraines completely however they are no where near as bad. I used to have to go in a dark room with a damp cloth on my head, eyes closed and a sick bucket. I can't say for differently that what I have had since are actually migraines but they are a lot more bearable, I can normally carry on with with I'm doing or watch TV now and no not throw up with them. I had my last one in December before having it done.
    I know I have mentioned I have experience some pain during the healing proposes and getting it changes but don't let that put you off as remember I said I did keep forgetting to clean it and did get it changed too early. Stick to what they tell you and make sure you have had no problems for a good few weeks before getting it changed! It doesn't hurt to wait a few more weeks if you're not quite sure. Also remember everyone's experience will be a bit different as it depends on where you go and how you handle pain
    Like I say my pain tolerance is terrible but getting it done I felt nothing! But I did from getting it changed too early
    Hope you guys are OK
    EmmaXX

    ps sorry about the spelling for some reason it wont let me click on the words to correct them i'm guessing something happened during the update


  • #2
    I really like the heart one, it's so cute!

    I got both my conches done in December but I hit the left one quite hard which made a bit tender and inflamed. It doesn't hurt as much as before but it definitely hasn't finished healing which sucks. I can't wait to change it once it's fully healed, I wan't this pink unicorn one that I saw the other day omg

    Dude, the pain is something else, It's like a sharp and intense pinch then it goes all hot/numb.

    Would you ever consider getting anymore?
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    • #3
      That's really nice , I have my helix, done top left corner and I love it, while it was healing it did get a bit green, bloody and sore but it's all ok now, I would say it's been a year or so, next thing on the list is a tattoo!!

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