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Support Circles on Sundays

Hey everyone,

We're going to be running support circles once a month on a Sunday! At the moment they run on Tuesdays, but for one of those Tuesdays, each month they will be running on a Sunday instead.

This next Sunday support circle will be on 26 November. If you'd like to come along, (sign up by completing the form here )
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Chatwee Update

Update - There's been some technical difficulties launching Chatwee onto our website so we will not be moving to Chatwee on Thursday.

As soon as we fix this issue, we'll announce another date for launching. We're really sorry for the delay in Chatwee, thanks so much for your patience.
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Post of The Month (September)

Maisy is our Post of The Month winner voted by the community for the following post:

"Hey Shaunie,

​I care. I really relate to what you have been experiencing with the house falling apart, and things not getting fixed due to general shame of the state of the house and not knowing where to begin fixing things or who to contact (you don't want to come across rogue tradesmen). Not even having adequate heating and hot water. And clutter. Everywhere. It's horrible to live in such circumstances, I know. It's hard as well when you see everyone else living a 'normal' life and yet being unable to talk about your situation."
(Click for full post )
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How to cope with annoying workmates!?

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  • How to cope with annoying workmates!?

    So I've been at my new job now for a little over three months and I trained with a number of people.

    I've done salesy kinds of jobs before but this one is the least cliche... no bells, no cheesy routines etc. There was one guy who I started with who had done selling before and seemed a little bit "salesy" in an estate agenty way. Seemed alright at first but as time has worn on he's REALLY started to get on my nerves with his comments and actions....drug dealing in the cigarette area... making comments like "Who the hell can live on 16,500 a year... that's poor people wages!" then going on about how great his sales skills are and demanding a pay rise because they gave him a company car (he's telesales who SOMETIMES makes appointments but isn't field sales). He rants on about why should he be on the same pay as me and two other girls when he "has more experience". Well we have degrees and have consistently met our targets and he's missed his.

    The last two days he's really annoyed me during a training session, trying to get me involved in some company product that is of no use to me or my customers and going out of his way to wind me up.

    I'm finding ignoring him and ranting to my sister when I get home usually works, it's obvious he has a low esteem as he's under performing in something he thought he'd walk.

    Tell me about your annoying co-workers and how you deal (or have got your own back on them!) with them.

  • #2
    Hey StarCrossed

    Working relationships can be really hard, essentially it's quite random to be thrown in to a situation with people that, outside of work, you might not chose to spend time with or even really get along with that well so certainly don't feel bad for needing to rant! Hopefully there are other people you've been working with that you do get on with better? This guy sounds like he's just itching to get a reaction out of you.

    Learning how to deal with different characters and personalities is a really important skill though. During your working life you're bound to come across some people that drive you up the wall and yet you have to maintain professionalism, which isn't always easy.

    It can often be easy to compare how they work or the things they say, to how you work and the way you communicate. You might find yourself just willing them to be different. Unfortunately if you've come up against someone that you find really annoying there's little you can do except learn to deal with them and find ways to communicate with them. And, like you say, if this guy clearly has low self-esteem then that can manifest itself in ways that aren't always easy to ignore when you're just trying to get on with your job.

    Having someone to rant to or just download to about your day is something everyone needs and it's great that your sister is there for that, it sound like she's a good listener. If she's not around you can always post on here

    You might want to have a look at our articles on embarassing colleagues and who to avoid at work too.

    Hope he doesn't drive you too crazy
    "The greater the problems you've survived, the richer your hidden history of achievement is likely to be."


    • #3
      i have the same problem with my workmates...they are constantly moaning about how much they earn. there are 13 people on my team and we all earn different amounts and they always compare/talk about their wages. its ridiculous. they keep trying to find out mine but i won't tell them because 1. its private and 2. im actually earning more than any of them so it will just cause problems especially as one guy who started on the same day as me is earning &#163;5.5k less for the same job. it just annoys me because they all complain yet it was THEM who negotiated their wage before they started and it was THEM who accepted it. not my problem. i can understand why they feel frustrated but *shrugs*

      i also get annoyed at them because they give me a bit of stick because im good at selling (without sounding big the best in the team and my manager has told me so). they tend to take the piss out of me and make me feel a bit bad for selling as much as a i do. im not being funny or anything though but im buying a house. i want to earn as much as a i can and work hard. i don't mess around like them and i get on with my job as boring as that sounds. it annoys me at the end of the month when they complain about how much in bonuses they are getting. how can they complain when they've spent the month messing about?

      im the boring one in team too. they let me know quite often as im not willing to spend money on a pub lunch everyday like they are.

      i only like two or three of my workmates. the rest just annoy me.
      Last edited by blah blah blah; 21-06-2009, 11:09 AM.


      • #4
        My ex used to work in a well known banking house in Glasgow City Centre.

        The stories she used to tell me were beyond belief. She was often told by her boss to wear shorter skirts and anyone on his shitlist got a really rough time. The unlucky ones in the offices got the job of folding paper and came out with paper cuts which looked so painful.

        I think this maybe a common issue in certain kinds of work places.

        For example, now and again I used to pick her up so she didnt have to walk with certain people to the train station (some of them sound like the type of people described above). I got a parking place and used to wait and was always wearing casual clothes. I was working near by earning quite a bit of money setting up data centers for BT. When they all came out all these office workers used to look at me as if I was some lower class society because I didnt have an Armani suit on (they all wore smart dress but they probably had a mentality that people thought they were stock brokers).

        I thought it was quite funny, she used to tell me about how these people used to brag so much but their job was completely non-skilled.

        This is not your problem, this is other peoples lack of confidence and feeling the need to talk nonsense or be annoying because their mind wants them to believe they are better than they actually are. Just smile at them, and don't look annoyed or irritated (they will mistake that for you being jealous). Be happy you don't share the same personality and don't react or get bitchy with them. StarCrossed is right, it's all about low esteem, but I don't think trying to get them back is the answer. Maybe just pretending to day dream and not hear them will annoy them more than it annoys you


        • #5
          Sadly being annoying isn't a crime (otherwise my brother would have been locked up a looong time ago).

          However, drug dealing very much is a crime, and by the sounds of it, you might have a case for harassment.


          • #6
            Originally posted by blah blah blah View Post
            im the boring one in team too. they let me know quite often as im not willing to spend money on a pub lunch everyday like they are.
            So because you don't want to spend 5+ a day just on lunch, you're boring ? Bunch of twats
            I've got plenty of baggage and i don't expect anyone to carry it for me. But you can have a good rummage through it if you'd like.

            katralla - That's right, I am Kev, and I am a slut.

            Munkey, Ruudy & Friends


            • #7
              Poke them in the eye, thats how I solved it.


              • #8
                I've never really had a problem with work colleagues, sure some may have been a little irritating but never to the point of actually avoiding them. Bosses on the other hand I have had problems with, especially those who think they're better than ya when they're clearly not.
                Conformity before conscience Uniformity before faith!

                To infinity and beyond!

                "the reason i took drugs in the first place was because ...i was confused.
                it's all become clear since" -Rolly.

                Just as it is true that a stream cannot rise above its source, so it is true that a national literature cannot rise above the moral level of the social conditions of the people from whom it derives its inspiration-James Connolly.


                • #9
                  Ahh I just read the posts on here and wanted to share/vent my frustrations! Hoping to get some ideas too if anyone has been in a similar situation.

                  I have recently started a new job, and another woman who started at the same time is driving me nuts She constantly makes references to my size and weight, telling me I need to put on weight and talking about my "short legs" etc, and at other times tries to mother me. She also speaks to me (and some others too) in a very patronising/condescending manner, and has made other comments to me that I would see as potentially being veiled insults. She has also called me a "nerd" for basically doing my job, instead of leaving everything until the last minute.

                  I am not sure what to do about this, I am trying to avoid her but it's proving difficult so far.. I am also trying to think of a way of letting her know that her behaviour is upsetting me, as I am unsure whether she realises how bad her behaviour is.. I suspect she may see it all as a "joke".

                  This woman is about 6 years older than me, however she has recently changed careers so is somewhat older than most people are when they start in our position. I suspect this is probably a big part of the reason she is behaving this way... but whatever the cause, it's very annoying!!


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