First Valentine’s Day ideas

Valentine’s day may just be a commercialised holiday made up by greeting cards in your eyes, but your partner probably feels differently. In which case you’ve gotta get your act together - and quick. So join The Mix as we share some first Valentine’s Day ideas to help get you through it.

A young man is looking over his shoulder. He is planning his first Valentine's day. This is a wide-angle image.

Even if you’re ‘not really into’ Valentine’s Day, there’s no real way of getting out of it, especially if you’ve been with someone more than a year. Now is the time to tell them exactly how you feel (if you haven’t already) and to gush about what an amazing partner they’ve been. Preferably without being under the influence.

Here’s the big question – are you ‘doing’ Valentine’s?

If you’ve both decided early on that you ‘just don’t do Valentine’s’, then you’re all set. You might just plan to stay in and have a takeaway followed by a movie. Whatever you end up doing – it’ll be stress free. Because, lucky you, you’re off the hook.

But if one of you wants to observe V-day, you better come up with some banging ideas. Just make sure to avoid the snogging couple sitting next to you at the flicks or restaurant – it probably doesn’t fit the vibe you’re going for. 

Not been together long? Go with a card for your first Valentine’s Day card

If you’ve only been together a couple of weeks don’t panic. There’s no end to the options available for a first Valentine’s day card; they don’t all have to say ‘I love you’ (it’s way too soon for that) or feature embarrassing outdated romantic stereotypes. If you’ve only been on one date then stick to a nice or funny card with a few words in it and a couple of kisses at the end. 

You should also steer clear of any Valentine’s Day gifts; go for a single rose if you’re feeling especially ‘loved up’, but don’t deliver it to their work address. Pop it through their letter box or bring it with you if you’re meeting up on the night. It may also be that this early time in your relationship is more about lust than love; perhaps it’s time to break out the furry handcuffs. Try that, as well as a dinner beforehand, for a a few first Valentine’s day ideas and you’re sure to have plenty more to come.

If you’ve been together a few months and are in love

So things are moving along pretty fast: you’re meeting up at least three nights a week, you’ve already met the parents and you’ve introduced them to your friends. You can safely say that you’re in the category for slushy Valentine’s Day gift ideas. Easy. Need some gift ideas? You’ll find stores are overflowing with Valentine’s bits and bobs, from your classic adorable teddy bears to fancy chocolates, wine and flowers.

If you’ve been together a while but haven’t said ‘I love you’

But what if you’re still taking it relatively slowly? You’ve not said the L-word yet (however much you want to!), you meet up around once a week for a night out or to stay over and you’ve only just started letting your mates know about the relationship,

Don’t choose this opportunity to tell them you love them in a card – it’s so much better said in person. That way you can see their immediate reaction (and react appropriately). Suggest a Valentine’s dinner and see if they’re game – if things feel a bit awkward then it may just be because they don’t want to go out and share the moment with other couples doing exactly the same thing.

But don’t worry because there are loads of other things you could do instead. Maybe offer to cook them a meal, or if you’re staying over, make them a special breakfast (with pancakes cut into heart-shapes if you really want to make an effort) Or, if you don’t wanna go down the food route, suggest a romantic day out together.

If you’ve been together a while, but things aren’t great

Picture this: you’re approaching the soppiest day of the year and the only thing you want to send them is packing. If this is you and your partner, it may be best to try and get the ‘conversation’ over before the day approaches. Let them in on how you’re feeling; it may be that they’re oblivious to your unhappiness so, once you tell them, things may start to improve. Wait and see what they come up with on the day. If you get nada, then you might have to consider breaking up with them. If it’s you that’s the problem and you can’t be bothered to get them anything, then you should probably ask yourself why.

Maybe you really can’t get up the nerve to end things before February 14th. That’s OK. Just send them a simple card saying ‘Happy Valentine’s Day’. If they’re observant then they’ll realise there’s a problem- especially if you just write your name in the card with no message. If you don’t even send them a card on your first Valentine’s Day together and they still haven’t caught on, then it’s time to say good riddance. They didn’t deserve you anyways.

You’re single, unlike the year before

Last year you were spoiled with flowers and a weekend away but this year you’re stuck on a train. To make matters worse, the person next to you has an inflatable balloon and roses from her lover. You get home and there are no cards on the mat – could things get any worse?

Firstly, read our Single on Valentine’s Day article. Secondly, remember you’re single for a reason – the person you were with either wasn’t right for you or you weren’t right for them. Not to mention the mountain of positives that come from being single on Valentine’s. Think about it – you’re saving money from not having to splash out on needless gifts or meals and you don’t have to save the date in your diary for the whole year just for them. With all that free time and cash at hand, you could even go out on the town and mix with all the other singletons. Yes that’s right – if there are other people out and about on the evening of February 14 and they’re alone, they’re probably single. It’s a pulling paradise, so get stuck in!

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Updated on 22-Dec-2021