Fuck buddies

Friends with benefits a.k.a, fuck buddies is a well-known relationship in the dating world. It’s for people who are looking for something casual, with no strings attached. The issue is that we’re all humans and we all have emotions. So, unfortunately, the fuck buddy situation doesn’t always work out as intended. Read on to find out more.

A young couple are standing and talking. They are fuck buddies. This is a wide-angle image.

What is a fuck buddy?

A fuck buddy, sometimes referred to as a ‘friend with benefits’, is essentially a totally sexual relationship built around, well, having casual sex, with no label assigned to it. A fuck buddy is not a girlfriend, boyfriend or partner. This means that there are no expectations to spend time with each other and develop a relationship outside of the bedroom.

Can having a fuck buddy work?

It can work if you’re both on the same page. If you want to get laid regularly, but don’t want to commit to a heavy relationship then it has a certain appeal. For example, you won’t have the usual worries about safety etc. that come with a one night stand. Ultimately, It’s a very personal decision about whether or not it’s right for you.

It can be a real thrill to have a passionate fling with someone who’s outside of your day-to-day life. Sometimes two people have incredible sexual chemistry, but beyond that they have little in common. The added sense of ‘naughtiness’ also allows some people to cut loose and play out their fantasies. However, for it to be a healthy situation, some ground rules need to be laid out. Basically, both partners need to talk about their expectations of having a ‘fuck buddy’ so that there are no misunderstandings.

When the passion burns out, if you were good friends already, you may find you can go back to being just mates and closer ones at that. However sometimes one of you will be too weirded out and you could lose them completely as a result. So before you dive into anything, just make sure that you’re willing to take that risk.

When being fuck buddies doesn’t work out

If it’s two people who like and respect one another, then it can work very well. However, often one person starts to develop feelings for the other one and tries to hide them, or even falls in love with the other person. If either of you are going to sleep with other people while keeping a fuck buddy then be honest about it. Otherwise there is a strong possibility of someone feeling jealous, betrayed, or having their sexual health put at risk.

Some people who go on about being a fuck buddy are just a bit selfish, or too immature to commit to a relationship. As a result, sometimes this type of relationship quickly becomes one-sided, or you start to feel used, in which case it’s time to make like Elsa and let it go; no matter how good the sex may feel.

Can a fuck buddy turn into a partner?

It’s often impossible for fuck buddies to start a regular relationship, since it starts off as no strings attached. What tends to happen is that the intensity of the sex eventually burns itself out – and you both find that you’ve got nothing to talk about. In which case, you won’t have to worry about getting into a relationship. But if that’s what you really want, then maybe it’s time to have a conversation with your fuck buddy. Or even reevaluate having a fuck buddy and instead try asking someone out on a date. 

Have you had a fuck buddy that did or didn’t work out? Share your story on our discussion boards.

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casual sex

By Nishika Melwani

Updated on 22-Dec-2021