I think I’m Non-Binary

Graphic shows two young people sitting on giant mushrooms. In the background is a night sky with a moon and stars, to represent the possibilities of a non-binary identity.

There is a lot to celebrate about being Non-Binary! You may also have questions about what this means for you, and that’s completely normal. We spoke to the experts at The Proud Trust, who have written this helpful guide on how to experiment with pronouns, what non binary means, how to find your LGBTQ+ community and how to get support if you need it.

What does Non-Binary mean?

Non-Binary meaning not identifying with only one single definition, is an umbrella term for gender identities that aren’t confined by the gender binary of ‘women’ or ‘men’. Non-Binary people might identify with no gender at all, or more than one gender.

Nonbinary and genderqueer are sometimes used in place of each other as they both refer to not identifying as solely a woman or a man. Not everyone views them as the same thing though. Gender identity is very individual so whether you prefer to identify as non-binary or genderqueer that your choice.

Read more about the meaning of genderqueer.

What should I do if I think I’m Non-Binary?

Exploring your gender identity can involve asking yourself questions like: ‘Do I feel comfortable with the gender I was assigned at birth?’, ‘would I be happier if people referred to me as a different gender?’ or ‘does being a boy/girl feel right to me?’. You might not know the answer to these questions straight away, and that’s ok! Some people are clear on their gender identity from a young age, and for others these answers come later in life. There’s nothing wrong with questioning or being unsure about your gender, you should go at your own pace and take all the time you need to figure out what feels right to you.

If you think you might feel more comfortable if people referred to you differently, try asking a trusted friend or family member to refer to you with the pronouns or name that you would like to try. There are lots of different pronouns such as, she/her/hers, he/him/his, they/them/theirs, xe/xem/xyr, ze/hir/hirs and many more. Trying these out with someone you trust can help you figure out what feels right for you. You can also practice referring to yourself with different pronouns to see how it feels.

If you decide on new pronouns and then change your mind, that’s totally fine! Sometimes it takes exploring and experimenting to figure out what is right for you.

If you would like to speak to someone about exploring your gender identity or coming out as Non-Binary, The Proud Trust’s Proud Connections Live Chat is open from Monday – Friday from 11-6pm and is a safe space to chat and get support.

Read more about how to come out.

Access the Proud Connections Live Chat here.

What can I celebrate about being Non-Binary?

Being Non-Binary is something to be proud of! Everyone’s Non-Binary identity is unique to them and that’s part of what makes being Non-Binary so special. 

What if I don’t fit into the LGBTQ+ community?

The beauty of the LGBTQ+ community is that it’s full of diversity and everyone is welcome! When you meet other LGBTQ+ people, you already have something in common. You don’t have to look or act a certain way to fit into the community. If you would like to make new LGBTQ+ friends, attending a youth group is a great place to start! The Proud Trust runs Youth Groups across Greater Manchester and Chester, including groups that are specifically for Trans and Non-Binary young people.

When asked what makes them proud to be part of the LGBTQ+ community, a young person at a The Proud Trust event said: “The people and the things they create. We show love to anyone no matter what and are the most accepting”.

Find your local youth group here.

How can I look after my mental health as a young Non-Binary person?

Talking to someone about how you’re feeling is a super important way to look after your mental health! You can talk to a trusted adult in your life, or you can join The Mix’s free online community, where you can chat to other young people in a safe moderated space about how you’re feeling. You can start a discussion about anything you like and you can remain anonymous if you prefer as well.

Join The Mix’s online community here and read our article on how to protect your mental health online.

You can also find support from LGBT Switchboard and Galop, who both offer specialist support to LGBTQ+ communities.

Where can I find representation of Non-Binary characters and lives?

There are lots of TV shows out there that have great representation of Non-Binary characters! Cartoons like Steven Universe, Adventure Time and Shera: The Princess of Power have a lot of wholesome representation of characters who identify outside of the binary. If you’re looking for something specifically aimed at an older audience, ‘Pose’ is a drama set in the 1980s and provides great education on the New York ballroom scene, as well as featuring Non-Binary characters. 

There are also many celebrities who identify under the Non-Binary umbrella, such as Jonathan Van Ness, Demi Lovato, Janelle Monae, Sam Smith, Amandla Stenberg, Bob The Drag Queen, Lachlan Watson and many more.

Next Steps

By Holly Turner

Updated on 30-Jun-2023

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